Thursday, 17 January 2013

Life on Loan

It's a bit odd, this Post-Concussion Syndrome.

It's sent me a bit mad.

For a while, my life didn't really feel like my life. I mean, shortly after the C had occurred (brain hitting against skull during accident, apparently) I was constantly aching, sleeping and not really aware of anything that was going on around me, but I thought that was the after-effects of the accident itself and that it would pass. It pretty much has, but with a few lingering personality changes.

What I wasn't prepared for was the feeling of imminent tears at any minute, and the unaccountable short fuse. Normally, I am quite patient. With the kids at school, at least. Then last week, I found myself either being profoundly irritated by them (and not only them), or on the brink of breaking down in tears in front of them all.

Since not being in work this week, the irritability appears to have lessened, and life is a bit more manageable. Especially with all the wonderful people in it, doing wonderful things like providing me with food and hairstrokes and things. Every now and then, though, I am overwhelmed with weary weepiness for no apparent reason.

Tuesday, for example, had been a fairly strong day. Tues eve came, and I was happily ensconced in a little bubble of joy, and then without warning and for no reason at all, someone poured a huge bucket of sadness over my head. Hugely unfair.

Weds was a heavy day, and I didn't deal with it very well.

And today I've mostly had a headache.

But tomorrow is my birthday.

And on Sat we have a gig, at which some of my most favouritest people will be.

And perhaps it will feel a bit more like my life, even if I am still driving someone else's car...
(which is actually my own. It'll feel like it soon, I'm sure...)

Viva la Birthday!

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